Waterfalls, goals and 25.

So I’ve been gone from this for a little while (regrettably) and I thought about updating this so many times but never actually took the time to sit down and do it. So I just turned 25 and now I’m feeling that urge to do something with myself and my life. Last year I moved into my first place alone and while I struggled with so much ‘me’ time to begin with (and boy, did I whinge about it) now I’ve come to depend on it and require more alone time to recharge myself. I’m moving again in two weeks into somewhat of an apartment, cheaper rent, closer to town centre, bigger kitchen, no charge for water usage and a balcony!!! Kinda feels like I won the lottery with this one. I feel more determined than ever to actually go and complete my diploma so this year I really want to work on saving a lot of money and relocating to the city to get it done. I spent my 25th birthday in Halls Gap in The Grampians and swimming in a waterfall (Mackenzie Falls) and it was probably the best way to spend my birthday without really acknowledging it. I didn’t have a single breakdown about it, though I did have a couple of dreams about it. This year I really want to worry less about others and how I fit into their lives and just allow things to happen and not get too caught up in my emotions. Not sure how successful I’m going to be in that but I want to be happy within myself and not depend on others for validation. I’d also really like to not get caught up in my mental illness this year and not indulge in self destructive behaviours or things that I know will harm me. If not for myself, for someone else I care a lot about and don’t want to disappoint.

Simple goals for myself this year:

  • Save money.
  • Possibly travel to a state I’ve never visited. Swim in more waterfalls.
  • Find peace within myself and my life, even when I can’t control all situations.
  • Stress less about the little things.
  • Find new hobbies and interests that bring me happiness and validation from myself.

 

 

Models Prefer make up review.

8152013121639This is a weird post for me to make because I don’t usually blog about cosmetics and make up, unless I’m talking about what I’ve bought, rather than what I think of what I’ve bought. But yesterday I went to Priceline to have a look at their sales and ended up at the Model’s Prefer display, eyeing off brushes. Now, I don’t need any more make up brushes (I have about 10-15) but they had a ‘3 for the price of 2’ sale happening and I wasn’t going to pass that up! After staring at the brushes for a while I still couldn’t decide what I wanted or needed to add to my little kit and started looking at products. I found this eyebrow ‘fixer’ gel and considering I have been using a wax over my brows to hold them in place (which was coloured and was prone to smudging, mind you) I picked it up and thought there was no harm in trying it out, especially because this was included in the ‘3 for 2’ sale. I also ended up picking up a eyebrow highlighter pencil (I’ve been using eyeshadow on mine) and this eye brightener cream, which is basically a pink concealer to put over dark circles under the eyes. I don’t really expect products like this to work, considering I try to use concealer on my dark circles all the time and they remain pretty noticeable so it’s just not something I worry too much about anymore, but when I used it today I was so suprised!

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(Models Prefer – Eye Brightener) Initially I wasted a fair bit of the product because I couldn’t figure out how to use it properly. I twisted and twisted the cap but it didn’t seem to be getting anywhere, so I got impatient and twisted it faster and then a heap of the product spurted out onto my hand. You only need to use a really little bit of it because it spreads a lot and goes a long way. It definitely doesn’t feel oil based so it’s a nice, light product to wear under your foundation. I didn’t take a before picture of my dark circles but they’re fairly dark and fairly blue. This picture grosses me out because I can still see yesterday’s eyeliner and mascara on my bottom lashline but I guess I didn’t really think ahead. I wasn’t going to try and do a review of it on my blog because it’s not something I really do or think I’d be good at, and I didn’t expect it to work as well as it did. But I am so impressed with this! It sells for $12.99 and it’s definitely becoming a staple in my daily make up. It’s awesome.

8152013152543 I used the two brow products and they’re both excellent. The  MP eyebrow highlighter is a white pencil and it goes on really smooth and considering I’m not a huge fan of pencil products, I really liked it and I’ll definitely be using it more often. I fill my eyebrows in with the Face Of Australia – High Definition Eyebrow kit and I swear by it, I don’t think I’ll ever seek out another eyebrow filler again. It comes with 2 shadows (powder form), one light brown, one dark brown and a wax, also in dark brown. I think the idea is you use the wax underneath so the powder sticks to it, but I can never get a shape I’m happy with by doing wax first, so I always do shadow to line/shape and fill and then put the wax over it to fill any gaps and to make them more sharp/defined. The MP Eyebrow Fixer gel is a cool little product and I don’t know why I didn’t use one like it before. These products are both now staples in my make up routine and kit.

8152013152838Another product I used for the first time today (but isn’t necessarily new) was the Australis Matte Me – Lipstick Mattifying base. I bought this close to a month ago and haven’t really used it because I’ve been wearing only matte lipstick for the last month (I no longer like cream lipsticks, I want everything matte all the time, now) so thanks to this cool little product, now all my lipsticks can be matte! I’ve been sick with the flu for the past weeks so my lips are chapped and disgusting but that’s what make up is for, right! I applied the mattifying base underneath my lipstick and liner (hence the word ‘base’) and while it doesn’t hold the lipstick in place perfectly (never decide to eat immediately after applying red lipstick, it’s a messy/awful experience) it definitely doesn’t diminish the colour or make it any less effective. It also doesn’t make it a true matte but I think that would definitely be because of the conditioning/moisturising ingredients in the lipstick itself.

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My eyeliner today is heavier than normal (mostly by accident) because I couldn’t get the line even and then you keep adding to make them balanced, and then it just usually ends up at the “It’s fine no one will be staring anyway” or “Now I look like a panda” stage, luckily I didn’t get to the panda stage today. In this photo’s it looks like I’m not wearing blush (probably because I’m still a little scared of it and don’t like to wear a lot) but I’m actually wearing Face Of Australia’s blush in Terra.

This post makes me a little self conscious because even though I love make up and have a big collection, I don’t normally talk about it or post about it but considering I think I know a little bit about it (and I did study for it and get a certificate out of it) I don’t think I should be insecure about it. I miss doing make up and I’m thinking about studying it further once I move and get settled in Adelaide. Why not, right! I put everything on hold and gave up all my own things for a relationship that didn’t work out and I’ve learnt how unhealthy it is to give yourself up for someone else and I know the only way I’ll find happiness is by finding it within myself and doing things I want to do and doing what makes me happy. So thankful to have learnt these lessons before it was too late. This change in my hair colour has been the biggest confidence boost. I was going through an almost quarter life crisis earlier this year (right after my break up) because I didn’t know ‘how I wanted to look’ or ‘what I’m supposed to look like’ or ‘who I’m meant to be’ and even though it was stressful, it’s actually freeing to realise ‘wow, I can be someone completely different now’. I definitely plan on being a stronger, happier version of myself from now on, because I spent my time since I was about 17 not feeling good enough for anything and like I couldn’t accomplish or achieve anything and hiding myself from life. I was actually hiding, and now I don’t want to. I want to go out and do everything I’ve ever wanted and I’m excited to start a new life in Adelaide with my best friend. 23 is going to be so much better than 22, 21, 20, and all the previous years, I’ll make sure of it.