Sometimes it takes a slight change to make a big difference.

Flic and I went to Warrnambool again a couple of weekends ago and saw some waterfalls. It was a really nice day until we got back into town and had a car accident. But we’re okay, her car not so much. I was worried it would put me off driving again but I’ve driven since and I felt fine about it. I’ve spent today thinking a lot about how far I’ve come this year. It’s so strange how one thing, like randomly deciding to chop your fringe off, and then chopping it even shorter, can throw you into a whole new level of self confidence. It’s so liberating to just decide to cut my hair and not care what anyone else thinks. I’ve never felt better about myself and had a better attitude towards myself until I cut my hair like this. I basically feel like I can take on the whole world and I’ll still look tough as doing it. And despite the fact that a year ago this day would have been significant to me for another reason, today now marks 9 months of learning to love myself and look out for myself and not depend on anyone else to do it, because they will always drop the ball. I wish it didn’t take until I was 22 (almost 23) to figure out how important it is to like yourself for who you are and to be okay with things you view as your flaws and things you tried to hide from everyone (even partners) for years. Today I feel great and I know, now, that the way I was living a year ago, desperately trying to please someone else and constantly trying to prove my worth to them, is not the right way to live and if someone can’t like or love me for who I am now and how I look, then I don’t need ‘em! Thankful to have had this lesson in self discovery this year. I’m so proud of myself and that’s not something I’ve felt for a very long time.

 

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