On Saturday (10th of August) I woke up to 2 text messages from Flic, one saying “Do you have money?” and “Are you awake?” and then an hour later she was outside my house and we went on a spontaneous trip out of town and state and went on a day trip to Warrnambool. We wanted to go shopping at Supre so that was our main purpose but I found nothing I wanted in store and I was really disappointed. Ended up buying an awesome candle though so I’m happy with that! It was nice to get out of town and as soon as we crossed the border and got closer to the coast the air felt warmer and lighter and I was instantly happier. So strange how even just being 100-200km from where you live (and hate) can lift your spirits.
Driving through Warrnambool was weird because I completely forgot until I saw those trees that I had actually made plans to have a life with someone here. I started looking at houses, and imagining a life with someone. I forgot completely about how invested I had been and the realisation of it all made me sick to my stomach. I could have been living there. We drove down streets I looked at houses on and names I recognised. I hadn’t thought about it once in the entire 7 months we’ve been broken up for. I felt really sad. I still feel sad. But the weight of the emotions I feel about Warrnambool and the regrets I have about that relationship are motivating me to take my happiness into my own hands and Kasey and I are talking about where we want to live in Adelaide and where I’ll transfer to, for work. I’m so excited to start making plans and putting things in place. Good things are coming and I hope I don’t dread or regret my 23rd year as much as I’ve regretted the last few.