I managed to catch sunset again this afternoon. I’m hardly home at the time of day that I get to see this (because I’m usually at work) but it’s my absolute favourite thing to see the light leaking in through the trees behind my window. I mostly just like to lay in bed and watch the patterns change on the wall as the wind blows through, disrupting the leaves. Most relaxing thing ever.
My past couple of days have consisted of clearing my head a bit. I’m finding a lot of things difficult to deal with and most of the time I just can’t be bothered anymore. I can’t be bothered with other people and since my relationship ending I’ve decided to take the ‘selfish’ taking care of myself route and stop giving such a fuck about other people. Feels really good to not feel like I owe anyone anything anymore and I wish I hit this off switch sooner, and I wish I could leave it off for even longer at a time. I’m making a decision to go back and finish my beauty therapy and actually try it for a career because I can’t still be where I am now, doing the same meaningless shit everyday with no sign of change by the time I’m 23. This post is coming across much angrier than I intended but that’s due to outside influences on my mood. One day I’ll be able to not to let other people’s bullshit affect me so much, I’m learnin’!
I recently discovered a love for cider this weekend and I think I may actually prefer it to wine? So glad I found something else I like because I’m ridic. fussy about practically everything in my life, haha. I also wore eyeliner today for the first time in 3 years and it didn’t look anywhere near as awful as I had anticipated and prepared for. I didn’t get to use my new Illuminator because I forgot to apply it after my primer! So disappointed. I’m going to try it on Tuesday because I have the day off and I’ll be able to play. I’m realising how much I miss doing make up and I’m remembering how badly I wanted to make a career out of it but I put it all on hold for my relationship (remind me to never, ever let someone else get in the way of things I want and need to achieve for myself again) and I’m starting to look into my options, though I don’t feel that there are many. I’m setting myself a list of things to do and I will get them done. This list includes finishing my cert III in beauty therapy, getting my license, getting out of my crappy job and into something better and moving to Adelaide/any city really. I need a change of scenery, along with a change of people. This is basically my 12 month plan, hopefully I won’t have to be stuck in my crappy job for another 12 months, though.
I cleaned out my make up drawer today because that thing was getting way too full and unmanageable! I threw out a lot of things that were disgustingly old (5 years) and products I never used anyway, I’m not even sure how I acquired most of them! My Lime Crime collection looks so much smaller when they’re all laid out in that image but I’m pretty proud of it. I’m not sure I’ll ever love a lipstick more than I love Lime Crime’s Glamour 101, also the Red Velvet Velvetines.
I recently discovered the Face Of Australia eyebrow definition kit and I am so glad I found it. Normally I just use an eyeshadow (one of those cheap ones that come free with magazines!) to fill my brows in because I shape them through tweezing but the combination of shadow and wax filler in this kit is amazing. I basically just line my brows, top and bottom with an angled brush, fill them with the darker shadow/powder and then draw over them again/set them with the wax. I’ve never been so satisfied with a single make up product before, so this is definitely in my daily must have’s and basics collection. I just love make up so much and I love to find products that work so well for me. My self esteem is basically based around my eyebrows (and hair) so it’s nice for them to look exactly how I want them to and to not have to worry about them moving or smudging around the place. I wish I could just be a make up blogger but I’d have no idea what to post about most of the time.
This is the eyebrow kit & how my brows came out looking after using it:
They come in a brown and blonde palette, obviously I’m using the brown. I think that even when my natural colour has grown out more or I’m blonde I’ll still be doing dark brows. I just love dark, defined brows and I like them to be the focal point of my make up/face (besides red lips).
Also I spent an hour and a half this evening having a little Paramore party alone in my bed. Someone (a legend) filmed the entire Detroit concert from two weeks ago and put it on youtube, in it’s entirety, as one video. I definitely got lost and felt like I was there a few times and I was so sad to snap out of it and realise I was in my bed and not really there, haha. I’m always going to be a Paramore fan. It’s been a good 8 years, here’s to another good 8 years! Hopefully I’ll be half as cool as Hayley in 8 years time. I wish the setlist for this past tour contained more new songs though, I’m pretty over Misery Business, That’s What You Get and Decode. I was hoping for Last Hope, Grow Up, Be Alone and (wishful thinking) (One Of Those) Crazy Girls. It was nice to see/hear Whoa again though! Been a while for me. It’s so nice to still have my favourite band and to not have it be ruined by the end of my relationship, because both our loves for Paramore was something we bonded over and shared. I’m glad I can still listen to them! (Besides All I Wanted at least).